I want to be a bird and fly, and shit on people.

(Source: omgphantastic)

2,056 notes

methroid:

my logic is that if i eat everything i won’t have anything left to eat and therefore i won’t get fat

547 notes

faggotunderthecorktree:

i can’t wait until summer so i never have to wear pants or get dressed or wake up early or do anything that involves being a properly functioning member of society

4,756 notes
  • ‎1950's lyrics: Love me tender, love me true, all my dreams fulfilled. For, my darling, I love you, and I always will.
  • 1960's lyrics: When the girl in your arms is the girl in your heart, then you've got everything.
  • 1970's lyrics: I hope you don't mind that I put down in words, how wonderful life is while you're in the world.
  • 2012 lyrics: Almost drowned in her pussy so I swam to her butt.
  • 48,787 notes